Wednesday, April 18, 2012

Our Fight To Get Our Son Back And To Keep Our Daughter

This blog is going out to tell our story of our two year fight with MCFD, the apprehension of our three year old autistic (we believe that he is on the autism spectrum, it's just hell to try to get him diagnosed so that he can get help) son and the fight to keep our daughter (she is still with us and we are fighting to keep her), who is now under the eye of the MCFD mainly because she was underweight, but is now eating well and is now low-weight than average, but in the 10th to 25th percentile for her age well within the safety. I want this to be a record of how we have struggled with MCFD and a testament that MCFD is not your friend. Whether young or middle-aged, sober or have had a problem past with addictions, are an intact family unit or a broken family, it does not matter; MCFD will TAKE YOUR CHILD!!! And drum up whatever they want to based on information that you give them.

The whole fight with MCFD is over the fact that I want my daughter safe (which is in my arms and at home) and the MCFD is looking at $$$$$$ signs for placing my children with a foster family. I'm not going to allow that, and I will fight it to my last dying breath. And I mean that literally, not figuratively. They will have to pry my daughter out of my cold dying hands after the RCMP has riddled my body full of holes.

They took Jamie (my autistic son), placed my son in a home clear across the way in Langley, at the very edge of the bus route, making it impossible for us with no vehicle to get out there. The buses run once every hour, making it impossible for me to go out to see my son on the weekday. It had to be the weekend and I ended up sick with a lung infection (thanks to acid reflux going into my lungs in December of 2010) for the first quarter of 2011 which required three rounds of antibiotics to kill off. Hence I missed a whole number of weekend visits which counted against me. They twisted that to mean that I didn't care about my son.

In January 2011, the British Columbia Ministry of Children and Family Development took Jamie because he was a FTT (failure to thrive). It later turns out that he may be on the autism spectrum. I suspect that I also have Adult ADHD (Adult Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder) which manifests itself in inattention to detail and inability to see something without it being pointed out to me. In this case, I may have missed crucial details relating to his development. On top of that. During the course of 2009-2010, I was grieving the loss of my father (a sudden heart attack which left me with the decision to have to turn off his life-support which my mother couldn't do; the decision fell to me) with whom I had been rather close to. With all that and having Jamie turn out to be more than I had expected with special needs, it was emotional and mental overload.

Now the Ministry calls me a risk to my children (to Jamie) and are looking for ways in which to wrestle the other three children (who are normal developmentally) out of my grasp. They may not have come out and said it, however I suspect that they are working on that. I may sound paranoid, but there is a saying: "Just because you sound paranoid, doesn't mean that they aren't doing something to you."

My daughter was underweight at the time the MCFD set their sights on her. She was throwing up her food when she ate, and I didn't know how to help her. She finally stopped this throwing up when I started giving her milk at the same time as her feeding. This throwing up business caused her to be underweight by 5 pounds at her 1 year checkup. After a regimen of strict eating and giving her a high-fat diet, she is now right smack between the 10th and 25th percentile, well out of the danger zone. Yet MCFD has their eyes on her and sees her as a potential money mill. They took my autistic son. I'll be damned if they take my daughter too.

Consequently, I now have high-blood pressure spikes whenever BC MCFD calls me or my wife. My last measurement for my blood pressure pegged me at 149 over 96, well into the red-line warning area. They are compounding this untenable situation by increasing the stress-load. What they want me to do is "crack under pressure". And I love my children too damned much to give those assholes the satisfaction of seeing me crack. I was diagnosed with depression (from an independent psychiatrist - not from one of the MCFD hacks) as well as "chronic anxiety". I suspect I have Adult ADHD, however I'm going to have trouble trying to get that diagnosed. I have never used drugs, nor have I ever had problems with alcohol, nor am I abusive. If I didn't have ADHD, I would have gone on to get a Bachelor's or Master's degree in a field of study that is well-paying.

My wife is working, I am the primary caregiver at home, plus I try to run a wildlife photography business from home because that is what I love to do. Yet society thinks that "hey, he doesn't toe the societal line, let's persecute him". What money that doesn't go into helping my children, goes to fund the business get off the ground.

My son is a casualty of the MCFD's tactics of "destroying families" instead of helping them. I will be monitoring the care of my son. And I will be taking photographs of my son every single time I see him, consequences be damned. When my son was in my mother's care during the time that his foster-mother was in the hospital, my son improved dramatically. I am going to make sure that I see that he doesn't regress when back in the foster-mother's care. If that does, the shit is going to hit the fan.

Let this photograph be my final testament to the travesty that is British Columbia's child protection agency.

1 comment:

  1. Please sign this petition to stop the abuse of children and families by the MCFD