With the MCFD, you cannot step wrong. They will bully you and try to pass that off as "what's best for the child". You cannot back down from their bully-tactics. You are in the "fight of your life". Like wolves to a kill, they know when they see weakness, that it's the prime time to attack. NEVER let them see you weak. Always present a strong face to the social worker. I have been at times hostile, but never weak. They know that if they face me, they face a wall. Only you know how to take care of your kids. Your kids will never bond to a foster parent. They remember you. I see it every time with Jamie, when he reaches up and wraps his arms around my neck. He calls my mother "MA" because he hasn't managed to get the hang of saying "Gramma".
Never let them bully you into not getting a lawyer. And make damned sure that the lawyer is not going to roll over and take it up the ass from MCFD! I am quite blunt when I talk to a lawyer. I'm pinning him to the wall with my question "Are you going to fight for my family or are you going to roll over for MCFD? Because when I get into court, I don't want to see anything other than we're going to fight! Because if you roll over and take it up the ass from MCFD, I'm going to sue your ass for legal malpractice." Don't hesitate to ask that question. And don't let them willy-wash their way out of answering. Whether they are Legal-Aid or whether they are paid for with your own hard-earned cash, they are supposed to play for your side, not acquiesce to the demands of MCFD.
Above all, present the best possible picture to the MCFD. If they want your house clean. CLEAN YOUR HOUSE!!! From top to bottom, make sure that they can't find a single thing to complain about. IF you are on drugs, GET CLEAN! Break your ties with those who use. IF you drink get into AA. If you are clean and sober, they can't do anything to you. If you care about your kids, GET CLEAN!!! Don't let MCFD win. Make damned sure that you present the best possible image. You might feel destroyed inside, but don't let the bastards grind you so that you don't care anymore. They've been trying to do that to me for the past two years. I'm not going to let them win.
Also, record every single thing they say. Whether it's a telephone call, whether it's a face-to-face meeting, if it is anything written, get photocopies and store a copy away in your file cabinet. Be organized. Make sure you have all your necessary court papers and MCFD documentation and communiques together in one easy-to-reach spot.
Under the Personal Information Protection Act (BC), at least one party in a phone call has to be aware of the recording taking place (that is YOU!). The MCFD will try to discourage taping and will even go to the point of stopping the meeting in order to bully you into not taping. You have your rights under PIPA(BC). Stand your ground. Be afraid, but be smart. Don't let them bully you into giving up your rights to hold them accountable for their actions.
You all have the ability to get your kids back from MCFD kidnapping. What it does mean is making tough choices. Sometimes it may mean getting out of your comfort zone. I will fight until my last dying breath. MCFD will NOT WIN!